Write and Conduct the Perfect Wedding Ceremony in 10 Parts (2023)

So you have to write a script for the wedding ceremony and officiate a wedding. Instead of grabbing a premade, canned example from one of the 695,691 websites out there, start with the 10-part wedding ceremony script draft I use every weekend.

A canned script is restrictive from the start. He says, "I'm not quite sure what I'm doing." If we use script for wedding ceremonydescribe, transmits to our partner that we are structured and flexible. The process ends up being much more collaborative and the final script much more personal.

It's the difference between "Hey, I bought this cake." Now eat it" and "Hey, let's make a cake!" Or something like that.

Call your significant other, sit with them for an hour over drinks, and brainstorm your way through this standard 10-part wedding ceremony script. Discuss any personal items they would like to add. I've included some of the more common variations where necessary so you can discuss some options.

Here is the draft ceremony script that I start with for 100% of the weddings I officiate.

The perfect script for the wedding ceremony in 10 parts

1. Start of the ceremony

The recorder steps forward (down the aisle or from the side) with Partner 1 and Partner 1's group, and then the recorder makes a few brief opening remarks.

• Greet the guests.
• Announce if photos are allowed.
• Ask guests to silence the phones.
• "Let's get started on that!" That is the signal for the procession.

Variations:

1. After the officer and Companion 1 and Companion 1's group enter, some grandparents or other important family members may enter and take front row seats before the officer speaks.
2. If Companion 1 and his entourage are part of the procession, the officer may enter alone and give the opening address before everyone else enters.

2. The procession

Music plays and the wedding procession begins.

• Entran los Ring Boys y/o Flower Girls y/o Junior Bridesmaids.
• Partner 2's group enters in single file.
• The officer asks the guests, "Please line up for [Partner 2] however you can."
• Partner 2 walks in with the parents, walks down the aisle and stands in the front row.
• Partner 1 moves forward to meet Partner 2 in the front row.
• Couples and parents exchange handshakes, hugs, and kisses with the parents.
• Partner 1 and Partner 2 look at each other and shake hands.
• The registrar asks the guests to sit down.

Variations:

1. Sometimes when Companion 2 and his escort reach the front row, the music stops and the officer asks who is giving Companion 2 a gift or who supports this association. Partner 2's escort responds: "Yes."
2. Ring boys and/or flower girls and/or junior bridesmaids may enter the procession first or just before partner 2.

3. The officer's speech

What makes today so important in this couple's life? They are the promises you make in front of your closest friends and family to always be there for each other ("vows"). This is what the officer says about it.

Some suggestions on what to say:

• Tell a story about the couple.
• Read a poem or excerpt from a book that is meaningful to the couple,
• say something deep and philosophical about devotion and fidelity,
• add a few prayers or blessings from the couple's religious tradition.

Be creative, be respectful, and remember that everyone there wants to have fun and participate! (Well, except for the couple. They don't want to be engaged anymore. Heh. See what I did there...? Ohhhkay.)

Variations:

We may be required by law to say some things at the ceremony, and I'll be happy to add them to the end of the speech. Some of these things could be:

1. "If anyone knows of a legal reason why these two can't get married today, please speak up now."
2. "[Partner 1] and [partner 2], you are here today to commit to each other in marriage."

How do we know if we need to include these things in the ceremony? Google in accordance with the laws of your state or province.

4. The exchange of vows

The couple makes promises. It's almost most of the day. No pressure.

Do not be afraid! See my two blog posts atThe three ways to say the vowsYmy curated list of the most popular wedding vows.

5. The exchange of rings

The best man usually has both rings. The official claims that the couple will now exchange rings as a physical symbol of the promises they are making today.

• The best man gives couple 1 the ring of couple 2.
• Partner 1 slips the ring onto Partner 2's finger.
• The officer asks Companion 1 to repeat a few lines about giving this ring as a symbol and reminder of their commitment (eg, “I give you this ring/as a token of my commitment to you”).
• The best man presents partner 1's ring to the officer (so he doesn't have to cut the front).
• The officiant hands the ring to partner 2.
• Partner 2 slips the ring onto Partner 1's finger.
• The officer asks Companion 2 to repeat a few lines about giving this ring as a symbol and reminder of their commitment (eg, “I give you this ring/as a token of my commitment to you”).

6. Pronounce the couple as married

"Well, before your closest friends and family (and before the provincial/state authority _________) I declare you husband and wife/married! [Partner 1], you may kiss [Partner 2]!"

Variations:

• Some officers put this item after signing, but I like to put it first. That way everyone has been clapping and cheering and the autograph session is more relaxed with a party atmosphere rather than stiff and ceremonial.

7. Signing of legal documents

Is this a legal ceremony? The officer informs the guests that the couple will be signing some papers and that we will all be back in a few minutes.

• the music begins.
• When the official legalizes the ceremony (or someone else does), go to the table and sign with the required number of witnesses (usually the best man and bridesmaid).
• When you're done, everyone returns to the center as before, and the officer prepares to make some final remarks.

Variations:

• Sometimes the couple chooses to do this privately with the groomsmen before or after the ceremony.
• Some countries do this before or after the ceremony, so you can skip it if it's not customary in your home country.

8. Closing remarks

This is mainly useful material for the following steps. The officer tells the guests 1) what the couple will do next, 2) what the guests should do next, and 3) thank you for coming. For example:

• "[Partner 1] and [Partner 2] will be stopping briefly to take photos and will join us shortly."
• "In the meantime, everyone is invited to the terrace where drinks and light refreshments will be served, followed shortly by the reception."
• "On behalf of the happy couple, thank you for coming and have a nice night!"

9. Presentation of the couple

Here, the couple is officially introduced to everyone for the first time. I usually say this:

• “Now, finally stay by my side; It is a special honor for me to introduce to you for the first time: _______ and _______ as husband and wife/married!" or an alternative (eg, “Mr. and Mrs. _______!”).

10. The recession

• The music of the recession starts immediately.
• The couple walks down the hall.
• When the couple has completely cleared the aisle (no photobombs or traffic jams!), the two wedding processions continue in pairs, arms crossed and beginning with the best man and bridesmaid.
• The officer addresses the family of Companion 2, congratulates them, and tells them to proceed down the hall.
• The officer addresses Partner 1's family, congratulates them, and tells them to walk down the aisle.
• Finally, the officer stands up and signals the second row behind to leave the room.

There you go!

Well, one thing to note here at the end. This is a standard 10 part wedding ceremony. Our couple can expand it to 22 pieces or 648 pieces by adding readings or rituals involving various family members, fire, sand, doves, F-18 flyovers, clowns, alcohol, etc.

Just join! And remember: it's not our job to coordinate all the little details, like bringing in all the candles and bird cages! Our role as officiant is to enable and personalize how you want your ceremony to be and to create the space for it. Use my standard 10-part ceremony script as a starting point, and from there, design any style of perfect wedding ceremony.

If you feel you need more help, I offer you aComplete wedding script + 1 on 1 coaching service here, and aComplete the Unboring!Wedding Academy wedding officer course here.

Now go out with your script and deliver your best. Ceremony. Always.